Shayde.thebritishempire
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| 10151 | 11/21/08 06:38:46 | 11/21/08 06:38:46 | 04/26/06 |
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642 |
St Helena
Hospice
R.I.P Mum
14/07/56 ~ 10/05/08

My best friends think I'm a godsend, my ex-boyfriends think I'm the devil incarnate...
well there's no pleasing some people...
04/16/08 01:48:44 | 0 Comments
I purchased a toy of the adult persuasion on Monday. I've been staying at my mothers house because she's ill and as a result, am feeling a little
sex starved. so, I thought, I will buy a new, silent & discreet vibrator and all will be well.
HA!
It was scheduled to arrive this morning, so I made sure I was up and downstairs ready to receive said package (no pun intended) before my 16 year old little
brother or my step-father got to it before me and asked what I had purchased.
The postman arrived, and, rather red in the face handed me a box.... that had had the packaging mostly ripped off and there, silently screaming 'look
at me, look at me!' was my new thrusting rampant rabbit v2.
Postman: "Are you Miss Shayde"
Me: "Yes"
Postman: "You need to sign for, umm, this package"
Me: "Right"
Postman: "Sorry about the damage, it fell out of my bike outside the sorting office and in to a puddle, the brown paper just fell off. It
was just kinda poking out. You should have heard what my mates were saying!"
Me: *Glare*
Postman: "Oh, umm, maybe not then. Ummm right, I'll be off then. umm, enjoy"
Me: *Glare. Slam door. Turn around...........
........Discover step-father and little brother peeking from behind the front room door, trying very hard to laugh very quietly.
Que me storming upstairs ranting loudly about everything from postmen to puddles.
Just before I slam my bedroom door shut I hear the muffled tones of my little brother floating up the stairs "Wow dad, she got that just in time
didn't she?"
Oh. The. Shame.
01/15/08 16:44:58 | 0 Comments
Gah. It's 00:43.
Had a moment of clarity with the (Now ex)boyfriend at 8pm on what is now yesterday. Have then spent last 4 hours at best friends house, drinking Merlot and
ranting. She has work tomorrow so has gone to bed. and i'm home. Alone. Bored. with no more Merlot.
Life is not fair.
Sucky boyfriends are shit. no more merlot is much worse.
Goodnight
01/05/08 03:15:32 | 0 Comments
I'm having one of those mornings. It's going to turn in to one of those days.... It's 11am. I got up 30 minutes ago, after Yes loans rang me to
ask about a loan application I made:
Chirpy Welsh TeleSalesman: Hello! I'm calling from Yes loans about your recent application!
Me: Mmmnfffwsgt?
C W T: Did you recently make a loan application?!
Me: Eh? about 5 months ago, which I rejected.
C W T: Oh. Sooooo... would you like to make a loan application today?
Me: What? No! If I did I would have called you!! *Hangs up*
Now, at this point I should have turned back to the warm spot I had just spent 6 hours making to consider how desparate I would have to be to agree to an offer
of employment that included calling people on a saturday morning to offer them 5 years of debt... I think I would prefer to be that person who tosses off
sexually aroused pigs for a living.... but no. I drag my carcass out of bed and try to decide what to do today.
So from here on in, anything that happens to me is my own fault. I had that moment of clear logical clarity and I chose to ignore it.
Wish me luck.